We all need a lil bit of change

Hey,

         I hope everyone had a verry Merry Christmas, and partied their asses off on New Years, and stayed thin!

I did actually very good on not eating.

Christmas was okay

Ney Years was awesome.

 I tried alot of new things!! 

I did some xany's, oxy, tabs, pot drank a little bit. Im partying one more night then im gana sober up.

Cause i have school in like 2 days.

Dam!!

I wanted to try some acid, but wasn't able to get ahold of it so that kinda sucked,

Staying fucked-up really helped not eating, i lost about 3 pounds, not much, but still not bad considering it is the holidays : )

I wana be pretty

I wana be skinny

I wana see the brighter side of it all

I want the whole world in the palm of my hands...

I have Alot of wants huh? lol

I'm really working on ;

being a better person

loosing weight

working out

studying more

taking school a lil more seriously

and living life to the very fullist!!

I blend in to much with the every day crowd, i wish i was unique,

but i hate being the center of attention.

Ugh, its confusing

Sorry im just rambling....

Noone ever comments me anymore, it SUCKS!!!

 Wow, she   is absolutely gorgous

I hate looking in the mirror

I hate the person staring back

I wish she would just go away

She's so ugly on the inside out

If you saw her you would hate her too

  LOVIN her legs..

I want to be different....

Comment plz

Hello,

My computer is an absolute piece of shit lol. That's why it takes me so long to update, blah. Well, i can honestly say im finally happy with my stomach. Now it's just my arms and legs that are bothering me. I plan on working out every day, and eating less. I wana be thin and pretty.

I will weigh every friday.

My goal is to loose 5 pounds a week, im going to try so fucking hard!

Cigarettes&Weed

Im madly in love with slipknot. Their finally coming to Oklahoma to perform. But the tickets are so exspensive!!!!

Dont think i can come up with the money :(  it sucks,

Me and my guy, are still doing very horrible. I've lost almost all hope, that this will turn out good. Were just horrible to each other, no trust what so ever....

My stomachs growling...But i dont want to eat.

<<<<<<<<<<<Legs

I got those from twisted_liess's

~Living a Lie, Dying Inside~

<Arms

This is personal but i need to talk about it...

I haven't had sex in so long! It's driving me crazy! It's been almost three weeks. Its like im so fucking fat my guy wont even touch me. It's heart breaking. Sex is what really hepls me ease alot of tension, and im just on the edge. My life just seems to be spiraling down, i have court on the 22. Its to long of a story to write it all down. My tickets are 122$, and to not have to go to court i have to have 75$ down. I dont have a job, and i am completely broke, if i go to court i will also have to pay court fines. I just dont kno what to do...

Hey,

 im just so tired, and so frustrated. Well about 3 weeks ago my friend told me my man had been cheating on me for about a month and a half with some chick that like 3-4 years younger than him, and other people also said it was true. i talked to the girl and she also admitted it was true, but that it was him trying to get with her, and she kept saying no (I don’t believe that), well when i talked to him,,, he said it was a TOTAL fucking LIE. if cried for days, and days, and still do cry over it, because he wanted to be back with me and i said ok. It's killing me living with the fact that i have no clue if he cheated on me or not. Then earlier he left my house, and about an hour later his mom called and asked were he was (he was spose to be going home) i told her i didn't know, and she said he hadn't made it to the house yet, Know my mind is just racing thinking that all the rumors were true, and he did cheat on me, and that he's with her right now. I hope he isn't :( i love him so much, but we honestly bring out the worst in each other most of the time...i just don't know. i would love if you girls would comment on this, and tell me what you think <3

So far today I have eaten zip, and it's 4 p.m., which is really good, cause I haven't fasted in a few weeks. I know it probably wont be a few day fast, maybe just one or two. All I kno is im cutting my intake daily to 750 calories at the most, then im gana reduce it to lower numbers as a week goes by. I want to loose all this weight, I want to be Pretty, I want to be THIN, I want to be.... HAPPY.

Well, since i have been gone i have got some new habits. I know smoke pot on a regular basis, but stangely it makes me not want to eat so i like it lol :)

HEY!It's been way to long. I have missed you girls so much! this entry wont be too long but i just wanted to let everyone kno i got my computer fixed, and i will be on here alot more.

My CW: 155

  Im so happy to be back, and have all the support and everything from you girls <3

Sorry my entrys so short but i don't have alot of time today.

          xoxoxoxo

         *Would the world understand if they looked into my head?

         What would they say when they saw all the numbers?

          The worlds to sublemanel around me *

 Thinspo

 Well i made a new xanga. This one just keeps messing up i'd really really love it if you girls would subscribe to my new one. I'd love to have all your support.

 Stay Strong<3

   My new xanga is.       beauty_in_the_loss_of_sanity

                                      much much much love.

  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox